Sunday, 24 January 2010

Another gray Sunday.

Good day guys. One more dirty-gray day in Milan. Insomuch gray from too many time for me as to decide I’ll soon paying 150 € more to catch the next scabby-bus to the south – my Calabrifornia.
And then they blame us being the largest part of the poor Xanax-Generation, wretched thirty-year-old young people drunk with drugs affecting the mind. To each his own, and everyone claiming that its own is the best medicine – Anxiolit & Atarax, Dalmadorm & Demetrin, Lexotan & the “Great Oblivon”, Quait & Seren Vita & Tranquirit, etc… All they have names promising the ruined and missing happiness’ retrieval. There’s no question of that. I mean that time and again our joy slides away, far and far. And the problem holds over for those people indentifying themselves in S. Mayer’s character words, the Jasper one, in her third novel entitled “Eclipse” (yeah, because today’s thirty-year-old young people are also those reading “Twilight” & “Harry Potter”, and most of the teenagers’ novels): «I wonder if you realize how the feelings in a room affect me».
Maybe it’s not your case, but it’s definitely my case – it’s not always so, of course, but I mean that it belongs to me waking up at once, and feeling myself like a sponge ready to absorb the feelings and the atmosphere surrounding me.
Having the doubt or just the intuition that you’re losing the main assessment’s ability, perceiving the fear that you can’t trust yourself anymore – it's terrific. It’s a very inexplicable feeling. So much unexplicable so that when you think about it, you can’t believe in it, you can't bear the fact that such kind of fears can pester you.
But you have to go on, though. You can’t stop yourself, or your life just because of this, can you?
In spite of the dirty-gray sky, of these bloody Sunday (ohmmygod, it sounds nearly prophane!) all we meet new people, new lovers, new fiancés trying to break the trust-padlock open.
J. Kerouac quoting Nietzsche, wrote in “Orpheus Emerged”: «And now I order you to lose me […] and find yourselves. And only after that you’ll have disowned me, I’ll coming back to you».
How do you render this? I’ve got my personal opinion about it.
But don’t worry now, because my future posts will be not so boring and not all written in this language. Moreover, I’ve still to tell you about DS and many other things more. More funny, maybe. Hopefully.
Have a great gray Sunday,
Rf

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